Feb 142017
 

Valentines DayRebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, talks about the importance of self-love and developing self-love practices.

Fuck Valentine’s Day. What a crazy idea! A greeting card company makes up a holiday so that people in relationships feel pressured to buy things for each other and people who are not in relationships feel isolated or shit about themselves.

Whether you’re in a relationship or not, the person you should be celebrating love with is yourself. Without proper self-love in place, there is no other relationship. No other sustainable relationship.

Self-love is the foundation for any other relationship.

Self-love is the garden bed in which we grow the fruits we can share with another.

Self-love, self-awareness and self-confidence. Without these any other relationship becomes a struggle, a falsehood, a sinking ship, a lie.

The Human Wound

The human wound, no matter where you’re from or how you were raised, is ‘I’m not enough’ or ‘I’m not good enough’. On a cosmic level that’s because we’ve forgotten that we ARE Source, God, Grace, the All-That-Is. We’ve forgotten that we are waves of the ocean of consciousness. We’ve forgotten that we ARE divinity and we are always trying to wake ourselves up. To re-member. To become whole again.

On top of that, our society reinforces this perceived separation every chance it gets. It tells us we need to be thinner, richer, smarter, whiter and so on. For many reasons, we hand over our power to something outside of us and believe, even more deeply, that we’re not enough unless we get/do/be/have the things someone outside of us (who has also forgotten) tells us we need.

Lack of self-love strips us of our power.

Learning to love yourself is a practice. It takes time to build the self-love muscles. Imagine going to the gym every day to get strong and build muscles only to leave the gym and be told that muscles are bad and wrong. This is sort of what it’s like trying to build self-love muscles. We are constantly submerged in a society that tells us that to love ourselves is selfish and bad.

Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare. Audre Lorde

A foundation of love

Let me tell you something. Without a foundation of self-love, there is no other love. If you don’t love yourself, if you don’t feel your worth, your value, then you are always a beggar for love. You are always coming to another half full, begging them to fill you up. When you learn to fill your own love cup you are never a beggar to love. You are rich and full and abundant and it is sustainable because it comes from within.

Self-love takes practice

Since we live in a world that wants to tear us down, that doesn’t value self-love, in fact, needs us to NOT love ourselves to sell us shit we don’t need, self-love is really an act of rebellion. And it’s needed now more than ever. On your road to self-love there will be obstacles. Some days will be harder than others. That’s ok. Be gentle with yourself. Love yourself through the difficult days. Extra self-love is needed on those days.

Love yourself first and everything else falls into line. You really have to love yourself to get anything done in this world. Lucille Ball

Here are 10 ways you can practice self-love:

  1. Look into your own eyes in a mirror and say I love you. Say it a few times. See how it feels. Don’t worry if it feels odd or uncomfortable at first. Do it anyway. Open your heart a little bit and say it again. If it feels awkward try again the next day. Do it every day until it feels really good.
  2. Listen to your body’s needs. Your body is giving you information all the time. What is it telling you? What is it asking for? Does it need more exercise? A breath of fresh air? Would it like different food or to go dancing? Often you know very well what your body is telling you and you override it. Don’t do that. Love your body.
  3. Take yourself on a date. It can be fancy or not. It can be a daytime date or a night time date. You can go out where there are other people or go somewhere you can be alone. Do it with the intention to spend time with yourself. Get to know yourself a bit better. Enjoy yourself.
  4. Mind how you talk to yourself! Your words cast spells. Everything you think and say about yourself creates a vibration that goes into your body, your cells, your DNA and actually shifts your physiology and therefore your reality.
  5. Find at least one thing you appreciate about yourself every day. Ideally write these appreciations down somewhere. Keep them in a special journal or notebook. Then on days you are struggling to appreciate yourself you can look back at ones you’ve written on easier days. You can write lofty things such as ‘I appreciate that I’m kind and generous’ or simple things like ‘I appreciate that today I’m still breathing’ or ‘I appreciate that I make great toast’. It really doesn’t matter so long as you really mean it.
  6. Get outside in nature! Whether you consciously feel it or not, being out in nature resets your energy system. Go for a walk in the woods or along a stream. Breathe in some fresh air. Get up close to some trees and feel how deep their roots go. Allow your roots to go deep too. Stand with your back up against a tree and lean in, ask for some love or just feel it’s strength.
  7. Soak in a high vibe bath. Put some Dead Sea salts or essential oils or flower petals in a freshly drawn bath. Light some candles. Yes, I know it sounds clichéd, but it really works. Sink into the hot water and take some deep breaths. Focus on your out breath and let shit go! Bathe with the intention of letting go and relaxing or of soaking in the magic of whatever you’ve added to the bath.
  8. Read something that makes you feel good. Just one paragraph or page will do. Read some poetry or a self-help book or something funny. Anything that makes you feel good, that opens your heart, that reminds you that you are an amazing being.
  9. Practice sitting in silence for a few minutes every day. Sit or lie somewhere comfortable and set a timer – even 2-5 minutes will do. You might find when you start this practice that your mind thinks it’s time to get busy and throw thoughts at you. That’s fine. Just don’t pay them any attention. Let them float past like clouds in the sky. Let them go as quickly as they arrive. After a while they will stop trying to get your attention.
  10. Masturbate! Be mindful of your intentions when you do. Whatever you are feeling or holding in your mind as you raise arousal will get increased. If you are feeling shame or guilt or fear, then those will get reinforced. If you are feeling love for yourself, if your heart is open and you’re masturbating as a path to self-pleasure, then you will be reinforcing your value and worth. 

Self-love, self-awareness, self confidence… these are more important now than ever before! The practice of self-love is absolutely revolutionary. Please practice it every day, in whatever way you can.

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Valentines Day
Nov 102016
 

What ifRebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, imagines a world in which, on a soul level, we are trying to wake ourselves up.

On the morning of 9th November, 2016 we woke to the news that Donald Trump had been elected 45th President of the United States. I witnessed outpourings of fear on my Facebook timeline. Understandably many people were shocked, and fearing for their safety.

Rather than adding fuel to the fear, I wanted to attempt to see the bigger picture. What, on a soul level, might be going on? How could we move forward with open hearts rather than the panic and terror I saw unfolding?

Below is the Facebook post that I wrote that morning. I share it with you here because I feel it is important to always look for ways to be a part of the solution rather than to add fuel to the fear flames. I post it here unedited, as it flowed for me on that morning:

Imagine that several thousand years ago, the ‘powers that be’, not the ones you perceive to be in power, but a small, secret, hidden group, decided that they wanted to rule the masses. To make a long story short, imagine that they decided the best way to do that would be to cut the masses off from their own natural, innate power. They did this by shaming our sexuality, by shaming pleasure and the body and intimacy and so forth. Shame and fear from the neck down. A society that values the mind and analytical thinking instead of, rather than as well as, the body, intuition, pleasure, connection, etc.

Now imagine that it wasn’t enough. They didn’t feel they had enough power or it was just time for phase two of taking total control. What would they do next? They would want to cut us off from love, from our hearts, from feeling and experiencing and expressing love, from giving and receiving love. How might they do that? By creating mass fear.

Perhaps they would do something to get the public’s attention like 9/11 (already proven to be manufactured) or Brexit. What I see this morning in my timeline is mass fear, panic, terror.

Whether my story is real or not, true or not, observe where you give your power away. Observe where you shut down your heart or your sexuality.

Your heart, your ability to circulate love and your ability to circulate sexual energy – all through and with Source energy, cannot be taken away and is still yours to claim.

Perhaps there is a much bigger picture here. Perhaps it is time we claim our power. Perhaps it is time we truly start to engage our hearts, our love for ourselves and each other, for nature and all of existence. We can use our Sexual-Love-Source connection to transform the world. It is time we wake up and start doing this now! They, whoever ‘they’ are, cannot cut out our genitals and hearts. They can create fear and shame, they can try and separate us from ourselves and from each other, but we still have power if we tap into it. Now is the time!

What if, in the bigger, bigger, bigger picture, ‘they’, whoever ‘they’ are, are really divine souls who are not separate from the whole either. What if ‘they’ agreed, at a soul level (or whatever you want to call it) to do whatever it took to wake us up? What if they agreed to appear to be ‘in the dark’ so we could find our way to the ‘light’? What if we are all, at a ‘soul’ level, in on the game and trying to wake ourselves up?

 


Rebecca LowrieRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

 

Oct 162016
 

Full Moon Sex RitualRebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, shares her Supermoon Sex Ritual for clearing anything which no longer serves you.

Yesterday was a rare Hunter’s Supermoon in the UK. A Hunter’s moon is one that rises soon after sundown, historically allowing hunters and farmers to work a bit longer by moonlight. A Supermoon is a full moon which occurs when the moon is near (within 90 per cent of) its closest approach to Earth in a given orbit. Its close proximity makes the pull and magic of the moon even stronger than usual.

I posted the photo you see here on Instagram and mentioned that I was going to do a full moon sex ritual. Someone asked me if I would  mind sharing it and, grateful for the invitation, I accepted.

Letting go of the old

I don’t know a lot about astrology, but according to those that do, this month’s full moon was perfect for helping us to let go of thoughts, habits, patterns and beliefs that no longer serves us. That was fantastic timing as I’m currently doing some deep inner work on letting go of some very old, very stuck stuff. I welcomed the opportunity to have the moon’s help with this.

Full Moon Sex Ritual

When I do a ritual by myself or with my partner, I usually don’t plan it in advance. I tune into my higher wisdom or Source or the Universe or whatever you want to call it and then follow my intuition. Usually that means starting by getting still, slowing my breathing and relaxing my body. That is what I did last night. That was my starting point.

Once I felt grounded, present and ready, I dedicated some candles to various intentions and then lit them and placed them around my bedroom. As I did this, I invited the moon to join me as well as the stars, particular guides that I work with, the trees and a few other realms that I also work with regularly.

I laid on my bed and felt these energies gather round me and I took time to welcome each one and to make a heartfelt connection with each. I asked them to help me to release and let go of anything, any habit, pattern, thought, belief or paradigm that no longer serves me. I was guided to take my consciousness through my body to help loosen up the stuff that was ready to shift. Feeling the need to move around, I got up and stretched and danced and moved my body as it wanted to move. The movement helped to unstick some of the stuff to be released.

After a while I laid back on the bed and started to consciously increase my arousal using breath, sound, movement and touch. I moved the arousal throughout my body, using it to lovingly burn off anything which no longer served me. I moved the energy up my spine, into my organs, into my bones and cells and right into my DNA. I opened my heart and allowed myself to open fully to the Universe.

I allowed pleasure and ecstasy to move through my body and my cells. I felt connected to the cosmos, the All-That-Is and individual at the same time. I brought my intention and the full moon to mind just as I orgasmed. It was intense and beautiful and powerful!

I laid still for a long time, basking in the the orgasmic afterglow and the soft glow of the candles. I offered thanks and gratitude to my supporters and felt them withdraw. Slowly, softly, I drifted off to sleep, knowing that the moon would continue to work her magic while I slept.

More Supermoons On The Way

It turns out that there are two more Supermoons this year. One on November 14th and one on December 14th. These Supermoons are a fantastic opportunity to get celestial help with whatever you are working on at the time. You can do a ritual similar to mine or create your own. Follow your intuition, bring your arousal into play and see what happens!

I’d LOVE to hear how you get on if you do create a Supermoon Sex Ritual. Please email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and let me know how it goes for you.


Rebecca LowrieRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Sep 102016
 

Your Sex Life Doesn't Exist In A Vacuum

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, explores the idea that your sex life doesn’t exist in a vacuum, it sits in the container of your life.

Our sex life doesn’t exist outside the realms of our daily life and vice versa. In order to truly, fully explore who we are as sexual beings, we also have to look at and address other areas of our lives. Our physical, mental, emotional and spiritual selves are all interlinked. Our sexual self is the thread that runs through all of these areas.

If you follow me on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram, you’ll know that I often talk about or post photos about health, going to the gym, eating well, meditation and being outside in nature. This is because these are all crucial to your sexual well-being.

I’d love to hear your comments about this and the video below. Please email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me your thoughts!

 


Rebecca LowrieRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Aug 032016
 

Nurturing YourselfRebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, talks about doing something to nurture yourself if you’ve had a tricky day!

It can be really easy to let a tricky or difficult day get the better of you and throw you off centre. It can put you in a huff, shift your otherwise healthy perspective and generally make you feel shit! If that’s not somehow kept in check it can roll over into the next day… and the next… and the next.

If it happens often it can have a knock on effect to our health, our relationships and our libido. Rather than go to bed with everything feeling overwhelming, sticky and generally crap, do something – anything – to nurture yourself and help get you feeling grounded and centred again.

I’m not saying you should try to instantly shift your mood or ignore your feelings. Feel your feelings, process them, sit with them. And also do something to nurture yourself along the way.

It doesn’t have to be fancy or expensive. One thing that really helps me to get grounded and centred again is to get to my nearest woods and sit in nature for a while. If that’s not your thing, try something else. It might be reading your favourite book or poem, going dancing, meditating, doing some yoga, working out at a gym or a million other things.

 


Rebecca LowrieRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Jul 162016
 

Words we use for genitals and sexuality

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, ponders the words we use for genitals and sexuality.

Woke up this morning thinking about how the words we use for our genitals are also used as swear words. And how we use words like naughty, dirty and filthy are used to mean someone who is very sexual or acts that are considered less than vanilla or mainstream.

How we language ourselves and our world is very important. Our words have energy and cast spells. Using words that have a negative connotation or are derogatory to describe our bodies and our sexuality is troublesome to say the least. It reinforces the idea and energy that sexuality is bad or shameful.

I wish there was an easy way to change this, to choose better language for how we describe our bodies, our genitals and our sexuality.

These are just my early morning ponderings. What are your thoughts about this? What better language could we use? I’d love to hear your thoughts! You can email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com or leave a message below the video over on YouTube. I look forward to hearing from you!

 


Rebecca LowrieRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Mar 282016
 

Speaking Your Truth From Your HeartRebecca Lowrie shares her new #MeditationMonday video, Speaking Your Truth From Your Heart

Welcome to #MeditationMondays #4, Speaking Your Truth From Your Heart.

This particular mediation was inspired by someone who commented on a previous #MediationMonday video, asking how to connect to your heart so that you can speak your truth, even in a difficult situation.

This mediation is good for you if

  • You need to have a difficult conversation
  • You struggle to stay connected to your heart when speaking your truth
  • You want to feel empowered to say what needs to be said

I really hope you enjoy it. If you do, please pop over to YouTube and give it a ‘thumbs up’ or email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what other meditations you’d like to see. Happy meditating!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Rebecca LowrieRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Mar 212016
 

Rebecca Lowrie shares her new #MeditationMondays video, Expanding Your Heart With Gratitude.

I have a regular, daily gratitude practice and find it immensely useful in so many ways. Most days I write my gratitudes down in a journal. Sometimes I say them out loud to myself or with my partner.

In this video, you are guided to use your breath to connect with the feeling of gratitude and to use that to connect to, open and expand your heart.

This is good for you for many reasons. Gratitude raises our vibration and helps us to stay aligned with ‘who-we-really-are’, beyond just the human facade. Being connected to this divinity, this deeper parts of ourselves, also connects us to a deeper intimacy – with ourselves, our partners and life in general.

 

 


Rebecca LowrieRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Mar 142016
 

#MeditationMondays #2, Using Your SensesRebecca Lowrie shares her new #MeditationMondays video, Using Your Senses To Be Aware Of Your World.

Welcome to #MeditationMondays #2, Using Your Senses To Be Aware Of Your World. In this meditation you are guided to tune in to five of your senses; touch, sound, smell, taste and sight.

Relax and unwind as you go on a journey to experience your world, your surroundings, just as they are, in the present moment.

This meditation is good for you if you want to

  • Practice being more present
  • Fine tune your senses
  • Be guided and held as you relax
  • Experience the sensuality of the present moment
  • Learn to cultivate more pleasure and connection

I really hope you enjoy it. If you do, please pop over to YouTube and give it a ‘thumbs up’ or email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what other meditations you’d like to see. Happy meditating!


Rebecca LowrieRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Mar 132016
 

Because of our wisdomRebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, reads the poem ‘Because Of Our Wisdom’ by Hafiz on Anchor.fm.

I discovered the poetry of Hafiz about 10 years ago, right around the same time I started exploring and working with conscious sexuality.

Hafiz was a 14th century Persian poet, writer, mystic and spiritual teacher. His writings explore love, life and intimacy, in particular with intimacy with the Divine. His beautiful, thought-provoking poetry has been known to inspire other writers such as Emerson, Nietzsche and apparently even Arthur Conan Doyle.

I have been trying out the new Anchor.fm app for the last couple of weeks and have already made some incredible connections there. The app is sort of like Twitter except it’s all audio instead of writing. I was inspired one morning to read some Hafiz and wanted to share it with you here. I hope you enjoy it!

Because Of Our Wisdom

In many parts of this world water is

Scarce and precious.

People sometimes have to walk

A great distance

Then carry heavy jugs upon their

Heads.

Because of our wisdom, we will travel

Far for love.

All movement is a sign of

Thirst.

Most speaking really says,

‘I am hungry to know you.’

Every desire of your body is holy;

Every desire of your body is

Holy.

Dear one,

Why wait until you re dying

To discover that divine

Truth?


Rebecca Lowrie

Rebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Mar 072016
 

#MeditationMondays #1Rebecca Lowrie starts a new video meditation series called #MeditationMondays and invites you to take part.

I was recently having a conversation with a friend about the different ways we both meditate and how useful we both find it. My favourite way to meditate is in the sauna! Since I can’t get there as often as I’d like, I also have other ways that I like to meditate.

Sometimes I do it sitting still, other times I do it as a walking meditation, either in my suburban neighbourhood or in the woods. Occasionally I’ll make the ‘mundane’ into a meditation. For example, I quite often turn doing the washing up, or tidying the house into a mediation. I do that by getting as present as I can to what I’m doing. I open my heart and allow gratitude to flow. I might feel gratitude that I have running water and soap to wash the dishes, gratitude for the meal we’ve just eaten and gratitude for my full belly. As I practice being present, the gratitude flows and the chores get done with ease rather than conflict.

I often use guided meditations in private sessions or workshops and have decided to do a little experiment. For the next month, I will put out a new #MeditationMonday video each week with a new, guided meditation for you. If I enjoy doing them and they are fairly well received, I will continue to make them.

This first #MeditationMonday video is Blending Earth Energy With Sexual Energy. I really hope you enjoy it. If you do, please pop over to YouTube and give it a ‘thumbs up’ or pop me a note at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com to let me know you would like more. Happy meditating!


Rebecca Lowrie

Rebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Feb 252016
 

Kindness and compassionRebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, talks about how kindness and compassion can open your heart and bring back lost intimacy.

I recently had a client who told me that he and his wife had grown apart over the years and that for a long time he had noticed that he was feeling quite ‘hard-hearted’ towards her. Their intimacy had dried up, there was little to no affection any more and he wanted to find a way to turn things around.

After he told me a bit about their relationship, what he loved and what he missed, we discussed ways that he could start to create the relationship that he really wanted.

We talked about how important it was to not suddenly go back to his wife with demands or to even ask anything of her at all for now. The first thing he really needed to do was focus on himself, on his own heart that had hardened. Ultimately we can’t ever change anyone else, we can only work on ourselves.

In order for him to start to heal and melt his heart, he would need to take small, easy actions each day, that didn’t require his wife to respond in any particular way. We talked about the importance of kindness and compassion in relationships and how he could bring more of that to himself and to his wife.

We are often quick to criticise ourselves or our partners, without realising the impact that has. We expect the other person to be on our wavelength, to want what we want or to agree with us without taking a moment to see how their day has been or to have compassion for what’s going on for them in that moment.

Consciously adding acts of kindness and compassion to your day and to your relationship are simple, powerful ways to start to shift things when they get stuck or to add refreshing, loving energy to a stagnant or stale partnership.

What are some ways that you can bring more kindness to your partner’s day. How can you make their life a little bit easier? What pressures can you reduce or remove from their day? What is a simple, open-hearted action you could take to help ease your partner’s load?

 

Also, if you want to rekindle intimacy, don’t go straight for sexual intimacy. Take time to rebuild trust and affection. Sexual intimacy will be a natural result of renewed trust and connection.

As mentioned in the video, carefully and consciously offer some soft, heart-infused touch or affection without any expectation or requirement from your partner.

If you’re able to, I would always recommend talking things through with your partner. If they’re not open to that or you don’t quite feel able, slowly and gently find ways to let them know that you’d like to re-establish connection and intimacy, in ways that don’t force or require them to do anything.

They may take a little longer to get on board or to melt through the layers of disconnection that may have built up over the years. Remember to be kind and compassionate – with yourself and with your partner!


Rebecca Lowrie

Rebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email Rebecca at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Feb 022016
 

Wisdom for your sex lifeRebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, shares how to improve your life and your sex life using ancient Toltec wisdom from the book, The Four Agreements.

One of the things I’m passionate about is that our sex lives don’t exist in a vacuum, they exist within the context of our lives. Sounds obvious, but I sometimes get clients who think that I can show them a magic way to have an amazing sex life without addressing other areas of their lives. I will be writing more on this in the coming months.

Today I want to share with you a fantastic book that I think helps guide us to live more easily in the world, thus helping us to have a better connection to ourselves and our partners. This in turn will lead to better life skills which translate directly to the bedroom.

The book is The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz. I first read this book about the time it came out in 1997. I was thrilled at how simple and yet deeply transformative it was – and still is.

wisdom for your sex life

The Four Agreements are ancient Toltec principles. As you become aware of them, and start to integrate them into your life, you will no doubt notice profound transformation in yourself, your relationships and how you live your life.

Let’s take a closer look at them and how they might affect your life and your sex life too.

The Four Agreements

  1. Be impeccable with your word.
  • Speak with integrity.
  • Say only what you mean.
  • Avoid using the Word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others.
  • Use the power of your Word in the direction of truth and love.

The words we speak are potent and have more impact than most of us are ever taught. How we speak, the words we use and our intention behind them creates spells. Think about it – we literally ‘spell’ words and speaking them is like casting those spells.

Whether we’re talking to ourselves, our partners, our work colleagues or even on social media, our words are powerful.

Be aware of what you’re spelling/speaking. If you want to live an easier, happier, richer, more fulfilled, more intimate life, then speak words to that.

When speaking with partners and lovers, and especially with yourself, be mindful of what you say and how you say it. Be clear, true and honest. If you are angry, find a way to dispel some of the energy and emotion before you speak so that you can be clear and not say things you might regret later.

Be mindful of your words and how you use them. Notice how different you feel and how the people around you respond.

  1. Don’t take anything personally.
  • Nothing others do is because of you.
  • What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream.
  • When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.

This is absolutely crucial and can be difficult to remember.

Think of it this way, everyone you meet or come across has a history, a past, or even something that happened that morning, which often informs how they move through the world.

We are all a complex product of our ancestry, our childhood, our thoughts, habits and conditioning. It takes patience, practice and awareness to really implement this agreement into your life, and it is totally worth it!

Combined with the other agreements, this helps you to be more present and more clear in your relationships.

Did your partner say no when you wanted to be intimate? Please don’t take that personally. Yes, of course you need to review the situation and take responsibility for whatever you need to take responsibility for, but look deeper.

Is your partner particularly tired, stressed or preoccupied? Could you offer to listen to what’s going on for them instead?

If you do your best to not take what appears as rejection personally, you open up the possibility to see what is really going on and that is intimacy – which is ultimately what we all are seeking.

  1. Don’t make assumptions.
  • Find the courage to ask questions and to express what you really want.
  • Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama.
  • With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.

Like the previous agreement, this is crucial to being clear in your life and relationships. Clarity allows us to see the bigger picture and to make informed choices.

Don’t assume that you know why your partner is feeling a certain way. Don’t assume that they will respond in a certain way. Treat each moment anew. Unless you’ve taken the time to find out, you don’t know what’s really going on.

Even when things look or seem obvious, give someone the benefit of the doubt. Explore deeper. Most of the time people are just focused on their own lives and their own problems and are not trying to trip you up or reject you.

It takes a lot of courage to be vulnerable, to share our deeper thoughts, feelings and desires. It takes time to build intimacy and trust. So don’t assume anything, be open to what is and see how that creates more understanding and ultimately more pleasure and intimacy in your relationships.

  1. Always do your best.
  • Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick.
  • Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse, and regret.

When I first read this book and came across this particular agreement, I interpreted it to mean always push yourself hard. Obviously that is not at all what it means.

It’s much more simple than that. It just means, do your best in each moment, whatever ‘best’ is at that time.

Sometimes our best is outstanding and phenomenal. Sometimes our best is mediocre in comparison, but this is not about comparison. It’s about being true to yourself and the present moment.

What is your best right here, right now?

Anything less than your best in each moment is destructive. It can destroy confidence, patience and self-love for starters.

If you find yourself in a situation thinking, ‘Oh, I could have done better’, don’t kick yourself. Just allow yourself to notice, increase your awareness and then next time choose more carefully. Use your new awareness for conscious growth and expansion.

Conclusion

As I said before, these Four Agreements are simple and yet extremely powerful and potent. Together they are significant principles that will improve your life and therefore, your sex life too.

I’d recommend printing them out and putting them somewhere you can be reminded of them daily. Put them in your phone or wherever you will see them frequently.

Practice them daily and watch how your life and your relationships transform. 


If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual AlchemistRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!


Jan 252016
 

5 Steps To Being A Better LoverRebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, wants to help YOU be a better lover, and has a new eBook for you to do just that!

One of the questions I get asked the most is, ‘Can you teach me to be a better lover?’ People from all over the world, of all different ages and experiences want to know how to please their lovers, how to get more pleasure and intimacy out of their erotic experiences, and how to feel confident as a lover.

The great news is that YES, I can teach you how to be a better lover. 

Some people want to learn how to be a better lover through private sessions with me. I absolutely love, love, LOVE those sessions!

Learning to be a better lover is usually a process. It involves learning to be present, doing some self-enquiry, healing and letting go of ‘stuff’.

It often takes practice and patience to let go of old conditioning and allow your True Lover to emerge, to give that part of yourself permission to be free and to explore. It’s an exciting process that always leads to deeper satisfaction and fulfilment, more connection and intimacy and, of course, hotter sex!

However, not everyone can get to me for a private session and one of the things I am passionate about is empowering YOU! Soooooo… I’ve written an eBook (that includes 2 audios) so that you can learn to be a better lover from wherever you are, in your own time, at your own pace.

The 5 Steps To Being A Better Lover – Tonight eBook includes:

  • The 10 page eBook bursting with erotic information
  • Your 5-Point Action PlanTheSexualAlchemist.com
  • Practical tips for putting the plan in motion
  • 3 extra action bonus tips
  • A checklist to keep you on track
  • Plus two audios to support and guide you

Get '5 Steps To Being A Better Lover-Tonight!'

It is my deepest hope and desire that it will inspire and educate you and help you to be the very best lover you can be. I hope that it will help you to find your joy and pleasure as well as build your erotic confidence.


If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual AlchemistRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!


 

Jan 142016
 

Rebecca Lowrie at 50

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, reflects on turning 50 and what that means for the next 50 years.

What were you doing on New Year’s Eve this year? Partying, spending time with family, reflecting on the past year and thinking about your year ahead?

I was celebrating my 50th birthday.

You could say I was equally ready and thrilled and also a little bit shocked. I mean, 50!

Sounds so old in some ways and yet I feel like I’m just warming up! There’s so much I still want to accomplish and do and create and experience.

Just Getting Started

It fascinates me and gives me hope that great people such as Louise Hay and Steven Covey didn’t start their life’s work until later in their 50’s.

I often get emails from men saying, I’m having this or that problem, and I’m in my 50’s, so it’s probably my age.

No! It’s usually nothing to do with your age! There are plenty of people our age who are perfectly healthy with great sex lives.

Whatever it is, it’s more likely down to the culmination of your conditioning, thoughts, habits and beliefs. I can help you clear, heal and transform those!

Maybe if we believe that we go downhill with age, that’s what we create.

I choose to believe that I’m going to age like a fine wine or a smelly cheese – the older the better!

I feel excited and energised about turning 50. I feel like now I can really focus in on making a difference in the world. I know myself so much better now than I ever did when I was younger.

Dr John Demartini RebeccaLowrie.com 50

In May of 2015 I did a workshop with Dr John Demartini. He asked us what our 100-year goal was. What legacy did we want to leave? How did we want the world to be different because we were in it?

That question has stayed with me ever since. It’s such a big question! Why aren’t we asked that when we’re younger and looking for direction and purpose?

I don’t think I have a complete answer to it yet, but here’s what I’ve got so far:

My 100 Year Goals

  • In 100 years’ time, when I’ve been dead for about 50 years (I’m planning to live to 100!), I would like humanity to have evolved beyond fear, shame and guilt around sexuality.
  • I would like the majority of the population to feel liberated and free to own, enjoy, celebrate and fully embrace their sexual nature, their sexual selves.
  • I would like humanity to have a much deeper understanding and experience of sexual energy and of their own true power.
  • I would like there to be a much deeper understanding of how our sexual energy is meant for so much more than the sex we currently know and I would like to have obliterated the limited belief for many that sex = penetration.
  • I would like humanity to be living much more authentically as a whole, in harmony and balance with the self, each other, nature, animals, the stars the planets and to understand how their sexual energy plays a crucial role in that.
  • I would like humanity to understand, fully and deeply, that we must own and accept all of who we are, our light and our dark, our hero and our villain, our sinner and our saint  in order to live our truth, in order to be really present and authentic, in order to create nourishing relationships.
  • Ultimately, I would like to have done my part to help heal what I believe is the greatest human wound, the ‘I’m not enough’ or ‘I’m not good enough’ wound.

RebeccaLowrie.com 50Mistakes And Wisdom

Thankfully, if I’m going to live to 100, I have another 50 years to create and leave my legacy. In some ways it doesn’t feel like nearly enough time. I mentioned that to a friend recently. She pointed out that 50 years ago it was illegal to be gay in many countries and states and now, in many places, we have marriage equality finally blossoming.

So if I have another 50 years, that means I have my whole life to live over again! Only this time I have the added advantage of having already made a whole bunch of mistakes. This time I can avoid those particular mistakes and make some brand new ones. Hopefully that will help me learn quicker. Also, I don’t have the same fear of mistakes and failure as I used to.

Since I’m starting this part of my life with some experience and wisdom under my belt, I can make different choices moving forward. I can make choices that nurture my soul instead of hurt or squash it. I can be more conscious about who I hang around with, what I eat and how I spend my time.

I am so grateful for the glorious, messy, wonderful, painful and very rich 50 years I’ve already had, and I can’t wait to see what the next 50 years bring.

RebeccaLowrie.com 50

RebeccaLowrie.com 50

 


If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual AlchemistRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!


 

Jan 092016
 

RebeccaLowrie.com

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, invites you to join her for the Create Your Most Prosperous, Successful And Magical Year Yet Bootcamp.

On Tuesday 12th January, 2016, I’ll be running a very special online Bootcamp called Create Your Most Prosperous, Successful And Magical Year Yet!

In it, you’ll be guided through four unique rituals that will harness the power of the elements – Earth, Air, Fire and Water – to energise your intentions and send them out into the world to work their magic for you.

In order to get the most out of the Bootcamp, I recommend you take some time to get super clear about your intention. So I’ve created a video (see below) that helps you do just that!

Even if you aren’t doing the Bootcamp, these processes will help you get clear about the year ahead and what you’d like to draw to you or manifest.

If you’d like to participate in the Bootcamp you can book your place here>>>

Date: Tuesday 12th January, 2016
Time: 7-8:30pm GMT
Place: Any where you have an internet connection!
Cost: Only £18!

*All participants will receive a recording of the Bootcamp as well as a special PDF of information about the rituals. If you aren’t able to join us at the time of the Bootcamp, you can do the rituals at a time convenient to you.

In order to supercharge your intentions, it’s essential to get really clear about what they are. If you already know, that’s fantastic, well done! If not, take some time before the Bootcamp to get clear about the intention you want to work with during our rituals.

You will be guided through four unique rituals, each one harnessing the power of one of the elements.

My recommendation would be to create one very clear, very focused intention that you want to use for all four rituals. That way you will have really juiced it up with as much energy and power as possible.

Here are some tips for how to get clear and choose your intention. You can do all of the steps below or just choose the ones that help you the most:

  1. Create some quiet, still space for yourself. Just 5-10 minutes will do. Have a pen and paper ready. Sit with your back straight and your feet flat on the floor. Relax your body. Close your eyes and take three long, slow, deep breaths.
  2. Take a minute to think over the last year and write down as many accomplishments as you can think of. These can be anything at all that feels like an accomplishment to you: ‘I wrote a book’ or ‘I got a great new job’, ‘I cooked for myself more often than not’ or ‘I didn’t give up’. Anything at all. Don’t take any longer than a minute.
  3. Give yourself a pat on the back and maybe even do a little victory dance! Yay you! Shake your booty!
  4. Now take a minute to write down what you learned over the past year. ‘I don’t like cardio, but I do like weightlifting’, ‘I need to focus more on…’, ‘I am really good at….’, ‘It feels good when I make time for…’, ‘This year I want to create…’ Again, don’t take any longer than a minute.
  5. Take three more long, slow, deep breaths. Relax your body.
  6. Write down 3 ways that you limit yourself. ‘I only allow myself to earn…’, ‘I don’t stay in touch with friends’, ‘I often say no when I really want to say yes’.
  7. Write the reverse of the things you wrote for number 6. ‘I allow myself to earn what I’m worth, ‘I make an effort to stay in touch with my friends’, ‘I say yes to the things that feel good to me’.
  8. Write down 3 things you’d like to achieve in the new year. Be as specific as you can. ‘I will write a #1 best selling book about sex’, ‘I will learn to cook more vegetarian dishes’, ‘I will ring my mum once a week’.
  9. Now put your pen down, sit up straight again, and take three more long, slow, deep breaths. Then just breath normally, eyes closed, body relaxed. Focus on your breathing. Let all of the thoughts that stirred during the exercise above just settle or dissipate.
  10. Take your focus or awareness into your heart. Slow right down and ask your heart, ‘What is my intention for the upcoming Bootcamp?’ Breathe and listen. Trust whatever your heart tells you.
  11. Write down your intention in the form of a statement. ‘I welcome financial abundance and flow’, ‘I allow new friends into my life’, ‘I attract my perfect life partner’.
  12. Do another victory dance! Get your hips and spine moving, breathe and say hell yeah!

Congratulations! You now have your perfect intention for our rituals!

Whether you want to join us live on the Bootcamp call or just receive the recording to use at your convenience, book your spot here>>>

Looking forward to creating magic with you!


If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual AlchemistRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

 

Dec 282015
 

RebeccaLowrie.com

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, offers some ways to get your New Year off to a kick-ass start!

Happy New Year!

Wow, I can’t believe we are into 2016 already!

Thank you so much for your love and support during 2015.

It was a big year of transition and transformation and I truly appreciate all the ways we’ve connected during that time.

Here’s a few ways to get your New Year off to an kickass start:

  1. Let go of anything you might be hanging on to from the previous year that no longer serves you.
  2. Reflect on what has worked well for you and what hasn’t worked so well.
  3. Set some clear intentions for the first part of the new year.
  4. Sign up for the Create Your Most Successful, Prosperous And Magical Year Yet Bootcamp, happening online on Tuesday 12th January.
  5. Commit to doing at least one thing a day that improves you on a physical, mental, emotional, spiritual or sexual level.
  6. Book a session with me to explore your sexuality, learn more about yourself, expand your capacity for pleasure and love, build self-confidence and so much more!
  7. Purchase one of my new audio meditations to support your personal development journey this year.
  8. Start a gratitude journal and make sure you write at least one thing in it every day.

I look forward to seeing more of you in 2016!


Empower Your Erection


If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email me at rebecca@rebeccalowrie.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual AlchemistRebecca specialises in men’s sexuality and works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sexuality into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!

 

 

 

Nov 252015
 

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, shares a quote about the very essence of a Sexual Alchemy session.

The essence of a sexual alchemy session

Every now and then a something shows up on the internet that really speaks to me. This week I was deeply touched by this quote that appeared in my Instagram feed.

Go and love someone exactly as they are. And then watch how quickly they transform into the greatest, truest version of themselves. When one feels seen and appreciated in their own essence, one is instantly empowered. Wes Angelozzi

For me this is the very essence of what happens in my Sexual Alchemy sessions. Yes, other things happen as well but the essence, the core, is that delicious, intimate meeting of souls. That moment that you are met and seen just as you are – in a completely open, non-judgmental and loving space, something deep and beautiful happens.

Your body relaxes in ways you may never have felt before, forgotten parts of you wake up and start to integrate back into the whole and you feel lighter, brighter and more alive!

Bringing consciousness and unconditional love to our unloved places, the parts of us that are carrying fear, shame and guilt, has the capacity to totally transform and liberate us. [bctt tweet=”Being seen and loved exactly as we are in any given moment is incredibly empowering and life changing.”]

So whether we’re doing some deep healing on sexual issues, waking up dormant erotic energy, empowering your erection, exploring tantra or conscious kink, or anything else at all, please know that the essence of what we’re doing is creating a space for you to be fully accepted and loved just as you are – as a vibrant, divine and wildly sexy being!

If you’d like to know more about what happens in my Sexual Alchemy sessions have a read of these blog posts:

101 Things That Might Happen In A Sexual Alchemy Session Part 1, Part 2 and Part 3


Empower Your Erection


If you’re inspired and would like to book a Sexual Alchemy session, email me at rebecca@thesexualalchemist.com and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!

Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual AlchemistRebecca works with individuals and couples to help them expand their ideas and experiences of sexuality. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sex life into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!