Rebecca Lowrie, The Sexual Alchemist, talks about the fear that people feel about booking a session and why you should do it anyway!
Just about everyone that comes to see me tells me that they are nervous or apprehensive about coming. They tell me in their emails beforehand and again when they first arrive at my home. I welcome them warmly, often with a hug, and we sit down for a chat. Often people are visibly nervous. A sweet, but ‘what-the-heck-am-I-doing-here’ look appears on their face. There is nervous laughter, fidgety bodies and tense breathing.
Yesterday a delightful man that has been coming to see me off and on for a couple of years told me that he still feels really nervous on the train on his way here. However he completely relaxes once he arrives, we have a deep hug and he remembers how welcomed and safe he feels with me.
I reckon that what people are afraid of is partly the unknown aspect of having a session, but even more, of facing themselves, of finally experiencing the deep intimacy they have always desired. Sadly most of us are brought up to value the mind and rational thought rather than to value and listen to our bodies and our inner desires. Outer desires are fine, that keeps us focused on ‘other’ and out of our bodies, away from ourselves.
Inner desires are the messages from our higher self/soul/universe (insert whatever word works for you here) that lead us to peace, happiness, joy, and ecstatic experiences of our sexual selves. We have been taught to fear these places within ourselves, to ignore them. So doing something to actively connect with those places could feel scary. Add to that the enormous amounts of shame that has been shovelled on top of our sexual beings over time and you’ve got a potential heady mixture of fear and terror about exploring those areas of ourselves.
The good news is that you can do almost nothing better for yourself, your total health and well-being, than to address, explore and celebrate your sexual self! How we feel about our sexual selves, our sexuality, has an effect on every other aspect of our lives. If we don’t feel confident, satisfied, happy about something in our sex life, the rest of our life and our health suffers too. By giving this aspect of ourselves some focussed time and attention we bring healing to all areas of who we are and our whole life too.
Whether you’re coming for a session to address something that isn’t quite working for you, to explore pleasure in whole new ways, to expand your sexual possibilities or something else entirely, it’s likely that you will feel a bit nervous at the beginning and that is totally ok. It is a positive sign that you are absolutely ready for an opening and expansive journey into your true sexual self.
If you’d like to book a session or find out more, please email me at firstname.lastname@example.org and tell me what you’re interested in. I look forward to hearing from you!
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Rebecca Lowrie works with individuals and couples to help them have better sex lives. Using various forms of conscious sexuality, including tantra and conscious kink, Rebecca can help you transform your sex life into something deliciously juicy, delightfully fun and ecstatically blissful!